In light of this week’s gospel passage,* I have been trying to think of contemporary examples of people who are not judging others. There are sure to be numerous examples, but I haven’t been able to think of a single one. On the other hand, I can think without effort of at least twenty examples of people who are judging others, and I belong in the latter category.
As usual, when Jesus gives counsel on how to live together, his words seem counter-intuitive and almost impossible. And when he says to remove the 2×4 from your own eye before you try to remove the speck in your neighbor’s, I feel the truth in what he’s saying but not very capable of doing it.
Even if we’re outwardly being open to our friends and acquaintances, we’re sometimes inwardly critiquing everything from their appearance to their intentions. Woe are we! In preparing this homily, I remembered the old Church of the Saviour Handbook for Churches and Mission Groups and a journal entry shared by Kathryn Campbell, a dearly-loved member in the early days of the Church. She wrote about her own critical spirit in a most honest way:
The thing I’m most discouraged about is that I’m so judgmental. I sit in church on Sunday morning and think mean thoughts about too many people as they come in. This one is silly, that one is dumb, she is extravagant, he is weak, that one is narrow-minded, etc., etc. Why can’t I think thoughts of love and blessing and health? I’ve prayed many times to be delivered of all this negativism, but so much still rankles, and new stuff keeps turning up. Woe is me.
Our struggle is not with each other. Our struggle is with ourselves. It’s a struggle we all share–to love ourselves and forgive ourselves for being ourselves. We aren’t who we want to be. Some of us give up and hate ourselves and finally, everyone else. Some of us live in guilt. Some pretend to forgive. And some of us break through into forgiving ourselves and extend that forgiveness generously to everyone else. That is the Way I want to follow.
Abbe de Tourville urges us, “Let us put up with ourselves in charity…” and “What I am asking you, in the name of our Lord, is to have charity towards yourself.”
-Carol Martin, Bread of Life Church
For reflection:
- Are there certain people who really bug you? What qualities bother you the most?
- Are those characteristics you fear or reject? How might you discover the treasure in yourself?
