On Healing and Faith

Image: I Will Be Made Well © Jan Richardson

The stories of Jesus saying that people were healed because they believed in his power, or that someone else believed it on their behalf,* trouble me. While the power of belief is what makes placebos work, it is all too easy to blame people for lack of faith if they or their loved ones do not recover from serious illness or accidents.

As I write this, I am living with a setback in my own recovery from a recent knee replacement surgery, simultaneously grateful for the mysterious way that the body heals when given the right conditions, and concerned that my own actions (or maybe my lack of faith) have led to this setback. I am grateful for the prayers for healing that my friends send my way, and fearful that perhaps I have not prayed enough or believed enough that all will be well.

But prayer is neither a magic trick nor a bargain with God. I have lived long enough, and lived with enough grief and failure, to understand that faith is not an assurance that everything will turn out the way I want it to, no matter how much I weep with pain and frustration. No matter how much I beg God to heal me right now, there is no assurance of physical healing, only the awareness that I am held in a great web of love. No matter what happens to my body, my spirit can be whole and at peace.