Falling Down

Falling is not just a physical accident. Falling means recognizing freely and sincerely the limits of our strength in the face of situations that are beyond us and force us to submit. Falling shows our human frailty. It reveals the fragile clay of which we are made, showing us that we are neither omnipotent nor invulnerable. Confronted with such a fall, we may nurture a spirit of revolt…. Or we may nurture a spirit of resignation…. There is a third possibility, however. We can nurture the spirit of humility. While calmly accepting our fall, we may still trust in God, whose strength comes to reinvigorate our weakness, and get up again with renewed courage.

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NOTE TO READERS:  Starting today, and for some undetermined length of time, I will need to suspend inward/outward due to having contracted pneumonia, complicated by a chronic heart condition and an overflow of ungrieved losses and exhaustion. This quote was already lined up before I knew that perhaps the Spirit had chosen it particularly for me. Oh, but I do see it now—I am the one falling; I am the fragile clay.

Thank you for your faithful reading, sharing, and posting in the past, and remember that all of the earlier Daily Words, and more, can be found again and again at www.inwardoutward.org. Keep digging for your own life’s truth. It’s closer than you might think, in every falling, getting up moment. – peace, Kayla

Comments

  1. Selena Kilmoyer says:

    Bless you 10,00 x 10,000 for the gift of Inward/Outward! May your days go gently as the Divine Healer does Its thing.

    Be in peace.

  2. Richard Rumble says:

    Dear Kayla — my prayers ascending for your recovery, and prayers of praise, thanksgiving and gratitude for your excellent work — you have been a gracious bellwether to my days for several years… blessings on this forced time of fallowness, may you be covered in gentle grace as you recover — peace, and all good, Richard R.

    • Pamela A says:

      Thank you, Kayla, for reminding me about the third possibility which offers me hope and the world I interact with. I have empathy for you with the overflow of ungrieved losses and exhaustion. My sister, who passed away, shared inward outward with me! Be well and thank you Kayla. <3 Pamela A

  3. Judith Dancy says:

    Nearly every morning the Inward/Outward quote comforts or challenges or confuses me to the point of my having to spend time with it to absorb it into my spirit. Before I retired from pastoral ministry, Kayla’s lectionary study was so meaningful, even for a Quaker who rarely used the lectionary.
    Please let Kayla know how much I have appreciated her gifts, and that I will hold her in the healing Light of the Living Christ as she rests her body- and perhaps her soul.

  4. Oh, but we will miss you as we pray for you. My mornings will be very different without your email to guide and inspire. This is, indeed a great meditation for all of us who have had to face our vulnerability, our limits. We are only human.
    Peace be with you, Kayla.

  5. Kayla, May God be your healing balm in these days and may you know rest and renewal in God’s everlasting grace.

  6. T Brown says:

    Dear Kayla,

    Your daily words have been soul nourishing for me and, no doubt, many others, too. May the soothing salve and healing balm that you share with readers each day, return to you many times over during this time of rest and restoration.

    Sending heart- felt prayers and deep appreciation your way…

  7. Wishing you a new season of deepening and growth in your monastic retreat for reflection and healing – that you may find a deeper and broader wholeness and holiness in your life. Many, many thanks for the inspiration Inward/Outward has provided.

  8. Be well ,Kayla. And thank you so much for these words of inspiration. I have enjoyed them so much. Peace, Molly

  9. Karen Kenworthy says:

    Dear Kayla, these words struck me like a lightning bolt because I have fallen and failed so many times, and life can feel so unforgiving if falling is not seen in the right light. Reading this profound thought I felt like a light bulb went on in my understanding. Then when I read that you need to stop Inward Outward for a time, I realized how much it means to me. I pray for your healing. You have helped others in the digging for our own lives’ truth, and now all send the help and love back to you. Love and grace, Karen

  10. Elizabeth Marcus says:

    I am very sorry you are unwell Kayla. I so much like and count on your daily postings and hope you will soon have full recovery. Peace and blessings, Liz in Coral Gables

  11. Rev. Karen Hodges says:

    Dear Kayla,

    Thank you for the trove of beautiful and wonderous quotes that you and the Spirit have given. I hope and pray for healing for you, your precious heart and lungs.

    Peace,
    Karen

  12. margaret says:

    Our days will be the poorer for not hearing from you! Please allow God to heal and strengthen you in His own good time.
    Times like this I always remind myself that my favourite Victorian tombstone inscription is far too good to save until we are dead:”Underneath are the everlasting arms.”

  13. Dear Kayla
    I pray you will get up again soon as you find healing. I give deep thanks for your wonderful gift each day. Be gentle, grieve and renew.
    God bless from Melbourne Australia
    Julie

  14. Cathie McFadden says:

    You start my days and challenge my mind and heart. I will miss you and pray for your return. In the interim, may our healing God caress you and love you through this time of illness and grief.

  15. Judy Holloway says:

    May the healing light and love of Christ be yours, Kayla.

  16. Elizabeth says:

    This ministry of yours is a gift to us–thank you for your inspired choices and beautiful writing. Please take all the time you need to rest and heal and grieve and know we are praying for you.

  17. I, too, will be praying daily for your healing. Your daily offerings as well as your homilies have been a life line. I thank you for listening so deeply.

  18. Thank you, dear Kayla for the gift of this ministry and for your beautiful and heart felt writing. Praying for your healing as you heed the wisdom of your body. Wishing you nourishing rest. ❤️

    • Gary Lego says:

      God Bless you Kayla. You will be in our daily prayers. Your daily contribution has been as routine as getting out of bed in the morning. Thank you.

  19. Linda Wygant says:

    Dear Kayla,
    Sending thanks for your ministry of words and wisdom and faith. I am grateful for the way your gifts have enriched my spiritual life — and the lives of more people than you’ll ever know. I’m also lifting prayers for healing and renewed strength for you. May you know that you are surrounded by the gratitude of all your readers as you take up this good call to care for your health and spirit. God’s deep peace to you.

  20. claire bangasser says:

    Your post have been daily food for my soul.
    I will be missing your posts
    I hope you get better soon.
    You will be in my prayers.
    God bless!

  21. Freda Schlaman says:

    Dear Kayla,

    Wanted to let you know I hear the struggle you are facing. I appreciate your strength of character to know when it is time to regroup. I nave gained much from your postings and especially the sermons you wrote. You are a gal of much depth that I continue to admire.

  22. Maria Knight says:

    Thank you ,Kayla, for sharing these thoughtful messages with us. I have a mail folder stuffed full of ones I had to save. Praying that your health and strength will be renewed. May God bless you abundantly.

  23. Peace and healing to you, body, mind and spirit, dear one. You are already missed. Thank you for all you do.

  24. I will miss you and your presence and your wisdom! Revel in the time you have and let God heal your body and emotions. And come back to us

  25. Gabe Kajeckas says:

    Dear Kayla — you are such a blessing to us, and I will pray that abundant healing blessings will fill you up. Peace, Hope and Love, Gabe (Reston VA)

  26. Thank you for being such a means of God’s grace in our lives… we pray for rest, for healing, for the Spirit to comfort and bring you peace in the days ahead.

  27. Thank you for this daily gift. May God keep you and strengthen you.

  28. JoAnn Klink says:

    Kayla
    My journals contain choice quotes from your daily contacts. What is your gold now? May it flow through the brokenness of your life and heal you to wholeness.

    Peace to you,
    JoAnn Klink

  29. Barbara Keffer says:

    Dear Kayla,
    I have so appreciated your quotes and especially your own words that come from the depths of your soul. But I have taken them for granted and rarely wrote back. You call me to my own depths and to start to do my own writing. Blessings on your time to care for yourself as you have been such a blessing to so many. I will miss you words and remember you in prayer.

  30. Doug Ramsey says:

    Thank you Kayla for this and all the other inspiring messages you have sent. I pray for your complete healing and renewal of your mind, body, heart and spirit.

  31. Gene Bates says:

    Ina and I find our feelings expressed in Elizabeth’s words, “This ministry of yours is a gift to us – thank you for your inspired choices and beautiful writing. Please take all the time you need to rest and heal and grieve and know we are praying for you.” Amen!!!

  32. Dear Kayla,

    In addition to offering daily inspiration, Inward/Outward has been a wonderful link for me to my time at C of S in the late ’60s. Thank you for all the work you put into providing this great email service and your weekly meditations on the Scripture readings. I wish for you a full recovery and am praying that this happens much sooner than later.

  33. So many thanks for your heart, soul, mind, and especially the expenditure of your body. Blessings on your healing days ahead. May all Gods graces abound.

  34. I join these others who have written, to thank you for your faithful service to so many of us. And, yes, this is a “falling down” time for me, as well.
    I will be remembering you in my heart and prayers, trusting “all will be well” for us both. Gratefully, Jane

  35. Holding you in prayer as you take the time you need to heal. I am grateful for your ministry. Even more so, I am grateful you are giving yourself permission to do what is necessary for you to get and be well.

  36. Sarah Stiles says:

    Thank you, Kayla. May the love you sent out return to you 100 fold. You are a role model.

  37. I will be praying for your whole healing. Sounds like God wants some quality time with you! My long term illnesses that have necessitated a deep reorientation of my priorities have always brought amazing joy in the end. God works all things for the good of those who love Him.

  38. Bev Connors says:

    As you cocoon in this illness, who knows what further wisdom you are brewing? Sending love , hope, and huge thanks for the gifts you’ve shared.

  39. Landon Kimbrough says:

    Blessings as you heal.

  40. Kayla,

    Rest well and thoroughly. Thank you for all the comfort and insight, take care of yourself now.

    XO,

    Randy

  41. Sharon K says:

    Dear Kayla,
    I pray for your inner strength and outer health. May you heal and recover. Come back to us when you are ready. Thank you for bringing awareness to my day.
    With love

  42. Jeanne Johnson says:

    You are deep in my heart and prayers. May you find healing and comfort – and satisfaction that you have touched so many with your ministry.

  43. Barbara Pettit says:

    My very best wishes and my prayers are wit you in this difficult time. I hope you are able to take all the time you need for healing.

  44. Sweet Kayla,
    Deep healing and gentle peace. Great gratitude for your wisdom, words, and example of respect for self-care. Go slowly; be well.
    Kitty

  45. Sharon Pavelda says:

    Thank you, Dear Kayla, for resting from the word crafting to take time to be the embodiment of the wisdom you have been so generously sharing for so long. May you experience the strong and gentle flow of love coming from the hearts and prayers of people known and unknown as you rest and receive, as you would say, God’s inward and outward healing.

  46. Deanna Bowling says:

    Take your time, Kayla, and know that you are loved and so appreciated.

  47. May you be held is the gentle hands of God as you recover.

  48. Donna Wilson says:

    Thank you for your faithful writing. May God guide your rest and healing.
    Peace and blessings,
    Donna Wilson

  49. Dear Kayla,

    your work through inward/outward has been a HUGE blessing in my life and I have passed it along to so many. Thank you. I will miss this point of focus and orientation each morning.

    I am holding you in God’s light and wish you a great gentleness of spirit toward yourself and for a rebounding of life in and through you when it is time to rise up again.

  50. Betty Lowe says:

    Dear Kayla,,
    What to my wondering eyes should appear but a reflection to and about me. Well I thought it was until I read your personal comment. At 78 I’m having my own medical adventures including quite literally falling down. As to dancing, the best I can do is walk lightly with a song in my heart, accepting the path.
    Love,
    Betty

  51. Hope A Smith says:

    Thank you so much for sharing this wisdom with us. You will be missed. May you feel wrapped in love and the peace that passes all understanding.

  52. Charlene says:

    I will miss the daily reflections that are so thoughtfully chosen. Many blessings on your sabbatical. Keeping you in prayers.

  53. Linda Roberts says:

    Thank you for your years of faithfulness. This site was an early adopter of the internet format of sharing devotional thoughts and it has been a gift and a treasure. Bless you as you rest and recover. May you know God’s closeness as you rest and receive. Thank you.

  54. Kathy Carpenter says:

    Kayla,
    My prayers are with you. You are such a blessing. Rest well and heal, my friend.
    love,
    Kathy

  55. Love to you dearest Kayla. Sending healing energy to you. Thanks for all you have given, your words have been an inspiration time and time again. Now time for you to receive. Open wide because you’ll have lots of love coming.
    Love,
    Kathy

  56. Kayla,
    Our prayers are with you. Your postings are a blessing in my life. I cannot thank you enough.

    Love,
    Mich

  57. Please take care of yourself, Kayla, and do what you need to do for your health. Many thoughts and prayers are with you during this difficult season for you.

  58. Mary Naughton says:

    Kayla, I am so sorry to hear this news! Prayers for healing.
    I will put your name on the Daughters of the King confidential prayer list. Happy memories of Providence House and love love love Inward/outward!

  59. Dear Kayleigh, What more can I say that hasn’t already been shared here. it is clear y ou hold a special place in many, many hearts. God Bless you Kayla. Holding you in prayer. Eileen ( uk)

    • Apologies dear Kaylafor not picking up mis-spelling of your name. Correct Pelli g of names is important. xx

  60. Praying for you. Your thoughts and “shares” have blessed my life. Thank you!

  61. Kayla, will include you and the ministry in daily prayer for healing, strength and vitality. Your ministry is so vital. Thank you for all you do.

  62. Thank you Kayla for your well-chosen word pieces day after day. And now may grace and mercy be your companions as you heal body and spirit.

  63. Dear Kayla:

    Thank you for being transparent about your health issues, now we know how to pray! I have benefitted and been uplifted by your words so often. Now it’s my turn to uplift you with my words of prayer! God bless you and keep you and make his face to shine upon you as you take this time to be kind to yourself and heal.

  64. That is a good one.

    Kayla, saying prayers that you feel better soon.

  65. Carolene says:

    Dear Kayla,

    I’m very sorry to hear that you are needing some down time. May the Spirit continue to do amazing work in your mind, body and spirit as you recover. I’ll never forget the one Spiritual direction session I had with you and I continue to treasure and share the gems from Inward/outward! Thank you.

    God bless you.

  66. Dear Kayla: I have treasured many of your posts, some of which I have read over and over again. May you soon be well and may the Lord bless you.

    Lisa

  67. Rebecca says:

    I hope you feel better very soon. Thank you for all you have done and do.

  68. Cheryl M says:

    Kayla, blessings, peace and healing by the Creator Himself. Thank you for sharing your vulnerability and desire to continue to grow — daily, and in this post. How wise you are to listen to the Spirit’s prompting.

  69. Tootie piver says:

    I am keeping you in my prayers

  70. Pete Ackerman says:

    Kayla,
    inward/outward has provided support and encouragement daily, to me and my social action work. Now I hope strength and healing and joy be delivered to you at this time.
    prayers and blessings for and to you.

    pete

  71. Dear Kayla,
    I was so very sorry to hear of your illness and sadness. May God bless you and make his face shine upon you as you heal. Thank you for your amazing ministry to us all over the years.
    With love and thanks and prayers,
    Sue

  72. Richard Chorley says:

    Sending prayers for healing and wholeness your way!

  73. Kelly Fowler says:

    Take good care, Kayla.

  74. Gail Chesson says:

    Peace and healing to you. May you be surrounded by those who love you and those who can help you heal. Thank you for your devotion to the spiritual journey of all of us.

  75. James Johnson says:

    Go heal! You have helped us do that.

  76. When you spoke of clay and falling down it reminded me of my days as a potter.

    When throwing a vessel on the wheel the clay must have been kneaded, not too wet or too dry. There must be plenty of water, (nutrient) to eliminate friction as the hand hold the clay.
    If its overworked the vessel will collapse and need to ‘rest’ before being ‘used’ again

  77. Julia Dorsey Loomis says:

    Kayla , you have nurtured me through many a season, and I am deeply grateful. Now may the time of rest bring healing to you–body, mind, and spirit! I’m so glad I had the chance to meet you, once at a Pilgrimage of Peace and again in your home, when Stefan was visiting. Christ’s peace be with you.

  78. Di Priest says:

    This has been my all time favourite devotional/inspirational email. Thank you and yes, a time to focus on rest in the midst of your health issues.

  79. Melinda says:

    Thanks, Kayla. Prayers for healing.

  80. Katherine H Dinsdale says:

    Dear Kayla: You’ll never know how many you have encouraged, inspired, challenged and counseled, day by day, with these beautiful readings. I forward them, save them, print them and stick them on walls and mirrors and foreheads. Thank you for your example, your hard quiet work, your heart for seeking and knowing our Lord. I wish you peace and health and joy. Gratefully.

  81. may all the blessings and wisdom you have shared with others come back to you 10 fold. Your daily readings have been a life – line for me many mornings. Thank you for serving a readership unkown to you but who dearly love you .

  82. Ruth Wittorff says:

    Blessings for healing, Kayla. Your sharing is much appreciated.

  83. Nathalie sorrell says:

    I’m sad to hear of your grief and physical illness/distractions from what you probably would choose if you could…
    But I’m holding you close to my heart as well as our beloved creators …
    inward outward has nurtured me along my journey. I think Elizabeth oConner would be so grateful for the way you have used the gifts you were given.

    Please come back if and when that’s possible and know how warm a welcome will await you.
    Nathalie Sorrell

  84. Holland Lewis says:

    Kayla: My youngest daughter, Cassie Lewis, who worked in “Church of the Saviour ministries”, like 15 years ago (I think a home for women with children and dying of aids) told me I would have met you when my wife and I were hosted in a guest house there (Andrew’s House, I think) during her time there. The fact that I can’t remember doesn’t matter…I feel I truly KNOW YOU with the reading of your article and comments today. WOW…I’ve actually read what feels like my own “story” today with your autobiographical picture: My actual fall, plus, the exhaustion, ungrieved losses, etc. Can’t tell you how this has… does… and (I’m confident) will minister to me. I pray you will be “renewed n spirit day by day”.

  85. Theresa says:

    Kayla … these daily messages have been sustenance for me. Thank you for you commitment to them. I pray that you find healing and new life in your time away. Know that you will be in my daily prayers.

  86. Kitty Snyder says:

    Kayla: we are holding you in our hearts and prayers. My husband and I read your words every morning and are so grateful for them. Rest and take care of yourself.

  87. Tom Snyder says:

    Kayla: May the gifts that you have shared w/is over the years return to you a hundred-gold, & bring you healing, strength for the journey, & literally in-spite you w/the Holy Spirit.

  88. Kayla,
    May you feeling surrounded by love and support. So much of what everyone has written is so true and such reminders of who you are and what you have meant to so many of us. Read them over and know the truth of being “wrapped in love”. thank you for your giving to all of us so much. My prayers will be with you.

  89. Joanne Forgue says:

    Kayla, may Mary come very close to mother you as you rest in the heart of Jesus. So right that you step away when your body is speaking. Love and daily prayer … You are very dear to me and I thank you for your witness of His love.
    Joanne Forgue

  90. Norma Lee Kerns Barnhart says:

    Kayla, I will miss your ministry of writing and speaking through words to my heart. However, I affirm your actions now to pull back and care for yourself. I understand the unresolved grief and am looking at those places in my own heart during this Lent. You will be a part of my prayers as you find your way in this new journey. Care for yourself and thank you for your witness to our humanness and need for space. Peace, Norma Lee

  91. Dear Kayla,
    The deep peace of God be with you to replenish you and restore you to health and wholeness. We are all praying for you.
    Thank you for your loving ministry to us.
    Grace and peace,
    Ann

  92. Darla Vogelsang says:

    For Kayla – My heart grieves your absence from inward/outward and your burden in health. You have been a source of inspiration to me in my Hospital Chaplain ministry. I received so much inspiration from your Sunday commentaries and your collection of wisdom words. You helped me form prayers and prepare reflections for services. I am truly grateful for your gift of inspiration.
    Your image of broken pottery is fitting – allow the life-giving water of the One you serve so graciously wash over your brokenness, soften it to remove the illness and its debilitation, and then reform you as He sees fit.
    I hold you close in my heart that you have unknowingly touched – every day, enabling me to grasp the Divine Grace inwardly and outwardly through your ministry of the Word.

  93. Ina Baas-Penner says:

    Grace and peace as you recover your health and energy.

  94. Dear Kayla,
    Your posts have been a constant source of newness, hope, and reflection in the midst of my own grief and illness the past few years. Thank you for all your loving work to serve us with “good food” for thought. Just as you sent us daily thoughts on Inward/Outward I will daily pray for your rest, healing (both the pneumonia and grief) peace, and wholeness. Rest and let God carry you close to His heart under His wings. When we are weak He is strong. As Elijah was given hot bread and fresh water from the angel of the LORD when the journey was too much for him ….may you be given the Living Water and Living Bread from Jesus Christ as God tenderly heals you.

  95. Kayla,

    Thank you for doing this work for so long, and for modeling good self-care as you step back from it. I suspect that few of us understood that this is basically a one-woman effort. I wonder if there are ways that some others could help, if and when you return to it — I would love to send you potential content for your editing and selection, for instance, should that be of use.

    Regardless, blessings on you as you do the holy work of healing, beloved child of God.

  96. Holly Hamor Behre says:

    Thank you for the work you have done here. I have visited almost every day and am so grateful for the blessing of all these thoughts over the years. Prayers for your health and healing. From fragile clay, may wonderful and beautiful things be created anew.

  97. Kayla,
    Thank you, thank you, thank you, for letting God speak through you in so many ways to so many of us. May God bless you for taking care of yourself and taking time to heal. I hope you return to the blog. But I trust that God will lead you when the time comes.
    I hope that as you heal physically and emotionally you will have the same spiritual encouragement you have offered to us.
    Your friends (in Northfield, MN)
    Elaine and Scott and others

  98. Dearest Kayla; Kirsten and I out here on the east coast, long time friends of carol and Bud, hold you in our prayers as your body struggles to recover and your soul center finds welcome rest. Your words each Saturday have been have been such a blessing to us, as have your quotes through the week. We prayer for your deepest healing and rest, and for the Community to give you all the loving you need to find physical and emotional wholeness once again. May God’s Spirit abound to your healing and to God’s glory. Thanks for giving us your insight and wisdom all these years. Roger

  99. Phyllis Annett says:

    Dear Kayla,
    How I have grown to relish your words each week. Your wisdom frequently catches me – “Why I never thought of it that way before!”
    You will be in the prayers of so many of us as you move through this time of healing and restoration.
    May our God hold you in the palm of His hand.

  100. Mary Welch says:

    Dear Kayla,
    May all of these expressions of gratitude, appreciation and love , remind you of your dear preciousness to all you humbly reach with your intriguing insights and deep sharings prompted lovingly by the Holy One. We keep you in loving thoughts and daily prayer. Blessings,

  101. Dear Kayla,
    I have been trying to figure out why I haven’t received your emails daily and just realized I missed your last posting. I have missed them so much and now am even more grieved that you have stopped. I can’t tell you how much they have meant to me and inspired me in my daily living. I can’t thank you enough! I hope you know how much your spirituality has affected me and many of my friends. You always seemed to be so right on!
    I am so sorry for your illness and hope you will be able to take the time you need and heal and feel the grace of God with you. You deserve feeling whole and at one with God. May peace fill you as you recuperate and I hope you are loving yourself as God loves you. Selfishly I hope you will return to Inward Outward but I pray instead that you will find what is next in your life.
    Thank you so much for all your help in my daily spiritual life! I can not let you know enough how helpful you have been.
    Many Blessings… june

  102. Kayla, sorry to hear. I’m with you from across the miles. May you heal as you have healed many of us with this little rooftop of truth!

  103. Wendy Morecroft says:

    May our Lord bless you and keep you and may you rest assured of the gift you have given many across the world by your inspiring ministry.
    every blessing
    Wendy Morecroft

  104. You and InwardOutward have been life changing tools in my life as I grieved several losses within a very short period of time. I will keep you close in my heart and pray for your healing and comfort. You do so much for others, it’s time for the healing grace of God and his servants to immerse you with love and comfort. I am so grateful for you, I/O and CofS, thank you for your service. God speed and abundant blessings my friend.

  105. Beth Hood says:

    Dear Kayla,

    I’ve received your daily email for a few years now – I have many saved, I’ve forwarded countless. I can’t thank you enough for your thoughtful collection of poems and readings, which on occasion felt directly delivered to me by the Divine. I pray for you, and can appreciate the exhaustion of ungrieved losses.
    In the Spirit of Love,

    Beth

  106. May the peace of Christ be with you and know that you are in my prayers here in Saginaw, Texas.

  107. Glenda Tapper says:

    Continued prayers for your physical body this Lenten season. Please know you are missed – I still awaken hungry for your words and gave little thought to the strength this takes on a daily basis. . To quote you, “It’s closer than you might think, in every falling, getting up moment. ”
    Blessings, Glenda

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